I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
Randomize
