C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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