we should wear snuggies to the strip club
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Randomize
