let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize