laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
