bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
be right there i have to get my cape
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Randomize
