there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
