a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
