I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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