So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
