You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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