You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
I could make wine with my vomit
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
