apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
