made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize