i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
