He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
