i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Your penis caused this!
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
