do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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