I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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