bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
