would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
