if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
