I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
