My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Randomize
