I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
