I murdered the dance floor call the cops
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Randomize
