So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Randomize
