It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I deserve this hangover.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize
