please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize