we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Randomize
