We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
