im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize