I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize