I don't usually arrange sex via text message
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
now i know why i became what i already was.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
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