what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
