Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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