Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Randomize
