Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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