Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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