Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
