Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
