I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
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