If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Randomize
