Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
It's official drugs can't kill me
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Randomize
