i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
