If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize