I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
