Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Randomize
