i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize
