Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
